Will Murphy 🌹 is a user on social.coop. You can follow them or interact with them if you have an account anywhere in the fediverse.

Will Murphy 🌹 @datatitian@social.coop

Pinned toot

Watch my analysis and new job announcement: Towers of Cash - Campaign Finance in the 2018 Election for Governor of IL
youtu.be/B1b-Pl_iaAg

RT @xychelsea excited to announce our official senate campaign website and our complete platform 😎💕🌈 #WeGotThis xychelsea.is/running

hey it's Alyx from witches.town

guess i'm a virtual network entity now

does this call for a new avatar? my old one's kinda classic!

Did Invisibilia change, or did I? Last season felt like profound, evidence-based observations about life. This season feels like shallow pseudoscience.

Advantages of having Malort as my liquor of choice:
1. Never tempted to drink too much
2. If we have kids, they will not sneak more than a single sip of my booze in their lifetimes
3. Also if we have kids, Deb will never once be jealous of my cocktail during pregnancy

Highlight of the day so far: biked by kids on a sidewalk and asked where their chant was, after which they all belted out Hey Hey NRA How Many Kids Did You Kill Today? New moment, old tune.

At #SamsungCreate @tink is blowing my mind with her tips for designing voice interfaces.

I now want to have a go at building an Alexa skill or voice controlled web site demo.

: I’m Kelly, an organizer on the East Coast (mostly - + -based, though pretty itinerant). My politics are informed by + . I’m a living with + . In my past life, I was a diplomat and Arabist/Persianist. Side-hustles include with + . Also I love puns and dogs.

Ever had kefir cheese? Went to get my usual on-the-road dietitian's breakfast of yogurt, fruit and nuts, but they didn't have plain yogurt except in massive half gallon
tubs. This is in a similarly shaped container, so it should work. Right?
httpsocial.coop/media/4g-YzATdTquSoJFRzfY

Open Source voice assistant #Mycroft (yes an actual open source alternative of Amazon Alexa and Google Home) has not only almost hit 800% of its Indiegogo funding in Feb, but has recently switched to #Mozilla's #DeepSpeech project.

Deep Speech is just one of over a hundred projects taking part in #MozSprint May 10-11. They're especially seeking voices of NON ENGLISH speakers.

More new contributors added to these open projects = more real world innovative alternatives.

mzl.la/global-sprint

Happy . Thanks for reinventing the online community to once again be a place to build relationships and come to care about people rather than the Skinner box battle royale that the big antisocial networks have become.

Where user-friendly stands for self-managed with no Zuck-like mogul and not even a well-meaning admin who gets to decides the rules of the game.

@lain I was shooting heroin and reading “The Fountainhead” in the front seat of my privately owned police cruiser when a call came in. I put a quarter in the radio to activate it. It was the chief. “Bad news, detective. We got a situation.” “What? Is the mayor trying to ban trans fats again?” “Worse. Somebody just stole four hundred and forty-seven million dollars’ worth of bitcoins.” The heroin needle practically fell out of my arm. “What kind of monster would do something like that? Bitcoins are the ultimate currency: virtual, anonymous, stateless. They represent true economic freedom, not subject to arbitrary manipulation by any government. Do we have any leads?” “Not yet. But mark my words: we’re going to figure out who did this and we’re going to take them down … provided someone pays us a fair market rate to do so.” “Easy, chief,” I said. “Any rate the market offers is, by definition, fair.” He laughed. “That’s why you’re the best I got, Lisowski. Now you get out there and find those bitcoins.” “Don’t worry,” I said. “I’m on it.” I put a quarter in the siren. Ten minutes later, I was on the scene. It was a normal office building, strangled on all sides by public sidewalks. I hopped over them and went inside. “Home Depot™ Presents the Police!®” I said, flashing my badge and my gun and a small picture of Ron Paul. “Nobody move unless you want to!” They didn’t. “Now, which one of you punks is going to pay me to investigate this crime?” No one spoke up. “Come on,” I said. “Don’t you all understand that the protection of private property is the foundation of all personal liberty?” It didn’t seem like they did. “Seriously, guys. Without a strong economic motivator, I’m just going to stand here and not solve this case. Cash is fine, but I prefer being paid in gold bullion or autographed Penn Jillette posters.” Nothing. These people were stonewalling me. It almost seemed like they didn’t care that a fortune in computer money invented to buy drugs was missing. I figured I could wait them out. I lit several cigarettes indoors. A pregnant lady coughed, and I told her that secondhand smoke is a myth. Just then, a man in glasses made a break for it. “Subway™ Eat Fresh and Freeze, Scumbag!®” I yelled. Too late. He was already out the front door. I went after him. “Stop right there!” I yelled as I ran. He was faster than me because I always try to avoid stepping on public sidewalks. Our country needs a private-sidewalk voucher system, but, thanks to the incestuous interplay between our corrupt federal government and the public-sidewalk lobby, it will never happen. I was losing him. “Listen, I’ll pay you to stop!” I yelled. “What would you consider an appropriate price point for stopping? I’ll offer you a thirteenth of an ounce of gold and a gently worn ‘Bob Barr ‘08’ extra-large long-sleeved men’s T-shirt!” He turned. In his hand was a revolver that the Constitution said he had every right to own. He fired at me and missed. I pulled my own gun, put a quarter in it, and fired back. The bullet lodged in a U.S.P.S. mailbox less than a foot from his head. I shot the mailbox again, on purpose. “All right, all right!” the man yelled, throwing down his weapon. “I give up, cop! I confess: I took the bitcoins.” “Why’d you do it?” I asked, as I slapped a pair of Oikos™ Greek Yogurt Presents Handcuffs® on the guy. “Because I was afraid.” “Afraid?” “Afraid of an economic future free from the pernicious meddling of central bankers,” he said. “I’m a central banker.” I wanted to coldcock the guy. Years ago, a central banker killed my partner. Instead, I shook my head. “Let this be a message to all your central-banker friends out on the street,” I said. “No matter how many bitcoins you steal, you’ll never take away the dream of an open society based on the principles of personal and economic freedom.” He nodded, because he knew I was right. Then he swiped his credit card to pay me for arresting him. The End.

“I don’t believe our species can survive unless we fix this, We cannot have a society in which if two people wish to communicate, the only way that can happen is if it’s financed by a third person who wishes to manipulate them.”

recode.net/2018/4/14/17236504/

IS YOUR CHILD TEXTING ABOUT MASTODON?

lmao - love masto, always open-source
omg - our mod @Gargron
wtf - welcome to fediverse
imho - instance moderation & hosting opportunities
smfh - so many furries here
idgaf - I decentralized; gotta avoid facebook

"the Supreme Court referred to the Colombian Amazon as an “entity subject of rights,” which grants the forest personhood. This makes Colombia the first country in South America to designate a portion of the Amazon a “person.”

This looks like tood news to me...

earther.com/the-colombian-amaz