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There's an important lesson to be taken from this mornings killing of the UnitedHealthcare CEO… the bicycle is the best mode of transportation in the city. If the killer had tried to escape by car they would have been caught by the police, or might not even have made it to the CEO's hotel on time in the first place! If you want to be on time, ride your bicycle.
"UnitedHealthcare CEO’s wife calls shooting ‘senseless killing’"
Oh damn, the jokes write themselves but I need to not be kicked off the internet for taking it too far today.
@sam Just link people to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_murder and tell them to stop whining.
@sam
I'm sure she did find it senseless - there was no profit motive involved.
@sam the bicycle aspect makes this iconic honestly
@ahelwer @sam Agree! Out of all the lessons that can be drawn from this event, I was not expecting this: "the bicycle is the best mode of transportation in the city. If the killer had tried to escape by car they would have been caught... or might not even have made it to the CEO's hotel on time in the first place! If you want to be on time, ride your bicycle."!! 
️ @sam Biden’s gonna ban bicycles, isn’t he?
@sam downside is it's a bike share, so I hope he docked it somewhere far from his house and job
@neko @sam It apparently wasn't bikeshare, it's just that nypd are morons. https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:w45xv3md5q5w5eoqx3xhhe3n/post/3lcjinl26vc2s
@sam this is why Doug Ford is eliminating bike lanes in Ontario. It must be a crime prevention thing.
@sam Also, with all the tracking stuff related to cars, there's a lot more chances of getting caught.
But on a bike, you're a stealthy ninja. Drivers can't even SEE you most of the time even decked out in hi-viz.
@sam oversimplifying this, but
… Canadian medicare and Canadian gun registry and laws .
there you go. Case solved.
ps: "law abiding gun owners" is a veiled threat.
@sam that's the thing the modern day Assassin's Creed games got wrong. Desmond should have gone around with a bike
@sam But had the killer used a car to kill him, he could have shrugged and said 'whoops sorry, my foot slipped’ and walked free.
@sam In Manhattan, anyway (densest region in America)
Next to one of the only alleys in the city (there are literally about 3)
This was extremely badass but it would be difficult to reproduce in other cities or even other parts of Manhattan IMO.
@sam At least prison, Brian Thompson's killer will get free healthcare.