iona @iona@social.coop

Is it the heat going to my brain, or did I really just hear "...and you could win tickets to see Grindr The Musical..." on the radio?

Also, my computer is overheating and stuttering and hanging. It's a ThinkPad, so you can cook an Ulster Fry on the thing at the best of times.

It's so hot that milk with a sell by date of this Friday has gone off IN THE FRIDGE

Top Tip: If you find your house too hot at present, leave all your windows wide open overnight.

In the morning, there will be no electronics in your house to generate excess heat.

Seems like there will be far fewer "Ugandan Discussions" on the internet now: http://www.monitor.co.ug/News/National/Uproar-telecom-companies-implement-social-media-tax/688334-4640676-tnxx7x/index.html

(One for old school Private Eye readers.)

Why are radio stations persisting in playing songs by Morrissey considering his repeatedly stated support for far-right racist organisations?

They have dumped other artists from playlists for far less over the years. Perhaps the people in charge simply aren't aware?

The weather must be over 18 degrees today because the first thing I hear on turning on the radio is "Summertime" by DJ Jazzy Jeff etc.

#localradiolaws

Seriously: the bloke on the radio was droning on about dustbins for about five minutes. "We've got one bin for one thing, another bin for another thing, who can keep track?"

Who on earth lets these lunatics into a radio studio unattended, let alone thinks they are providing entertaining programming?

Coming up next on Local FM it's Dustbin Timberlake

On the radio: "That was Visage and Fade To Grey. And grey makes me think of the grey dustbins we've got."

This is real output?

I am okay. I went into town to post today's orders, popped into a pharmacy and got some migraine relief pills, bought some junk food from a local chain which is like a cross between KFC and Nando's, but more to local taste (ie. spicier!).

Today's Radio Leeds phone in topic is "cyclists v motorists". All is well with the world.

But the last toot is serious, not a radio related joke. Help?

If anyone gets the Zorp Furble Andromeda reference you get 100 radio anorak points

I've got a migraine today. That's not unusual, but what is strange is that I'm seemingly not able to understand the spoken word.

I've got the radio on and I catch the start of every news story but then no matter how hard I concentrate it descends into nonsense. "Gareth Southgate says that England flobble kapow zorp furble andromeda".

Has anyone else ever had this? Reading and writing is fine (obviously) but I can't understand simple spoken sentences.

On the news, it says that people affected by the current rail disruption will get back up to a month's travel as a refund.

Big whoop - I personally know of people who have lost insecure jobs because of the rail cockups making them continually late for work. £100 at most in travel refunds isn't going to pay their lost wages.

We used to have the same where I worked - Right Here by SWV meant there was some kind of problem at the station and management should come rushing in. Even now when I hear the first few bars I have a jump!

I've heard The Riddle by Nik Kershaw four or five times in the past few days. It's terrible. Why are you playing it?

Perhaps it's some sort of coded message - if we're under attack, play The Riddle on all radio stations

Are we really meant to believe that in the 24th century they haven't come up with a more efficient way of transferring basic information across a short distance than yelling "SHIELDS DOWN TO 24% CAPTAIN!"?

Even the most tinpot call centre in Wakefield or somewhere has a dashboard of operational stats on the wall.